Why not being maternal is ok

I was never that child who loved playing with dolls and pretending I was a mum. In fact from the tender age of 11, I always use to proudly state that my ambition was being a journalist. I'll give myself a pat on the back for making that come true. Babies didn't even enter my mind. I've never been one to coo over newborns either. Truth be told, I'm a little scared of them and they sense it. As soon as they sit on my lap, the waterworks start. Give me a dog? I'll turn to mush. Especially when I see a puppy. I can fully get on board with being dog broody.

I'm not even sure that I want to be a mum. I've worked extremely hard on my education and my career that I'm in no hurry to take a step back.  I come from a line of women who don't like kids. My nan and mum both lack the maternal gene. But they make amazing mothers. Go figure? For some reason some people just cannot grasp that idea. I've been told that I'm depriving my boyfriend – he once mentioned he'd rather jack in the kids malarky and travel the world. I've been told I'm doing the world a disservice and it's my role as a woman to reproduce. I've been given condescending advice that I should just wait. My clock will soon be ticking and I'll have a sudden urge. I've been told I don't know what I'm missing out on. I've been told I don't know what I'm talking about at my age. 

I might very well change my mind. I could reach 30 and have the sudden urge to reproduce. I look and mine and my mum's amazing relationship and long for that myself. But do you know what? It's ok to not want to bring a child into the world. It doesn't make you less of a woman. You don't lose your femininity simply because you don't want to give birth. It's not the be all and end all if you don't ever hear the word mum. Don't be made to feel bad just because you prefer to have a career over raising a family. The beauty of the world is you should be who you want to be.

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Letting go of friendships

Friends are one of the best things in the world. If you pick them right, they can even become like family. But friends can also cause a lot of anxiety and stress.

As I've got older I've become very good at letting friendships go. If they're not making me happy, then I cut ties. A friend shouldn't be hard work. You shouldn't come away from a lunch feeling emotional about the way it has gone. Even if you don't see them for months on end, it should be like you've never spent a moment apart once you meet up again.

Friendships can very quickly become toxic. They can quickly make you feel worthless and upset. You deserve better. It takes two people to make a friendship work - it isn't always down to you to keep it afloat. Just because you've been friends with someone for years, it doesn't mean they should always be in your life. I'm a firm believer that some friends just aren't forever. People move at a different pace to one another. As you grow older, you change. Your interests, outlook on life and opinions change over time. I'm a very different person to when I was 18 to what I am now at the grand age of 26. Just because you're not getting on now, it doesn't mean you should feel like the friendship is a waste. You may have had five years of laughs but it's gone past it's sell-by-date.

But once you find a group of people who make you feel happy, who are easy to be around and who are always on the end of a phone ready to listen to your quarter-life crisis, make sure you hold on tight and never let go.  Those ones are keepers. It's much better to have a handful of solid good friends than lots of alright friends who couldn't really care if you're having a rough time at work.

Don't be afraid to say no more. No friendship is worth having if it makes you always second guess yourself and stops being fun. You deserve to be treated how you treat other people.

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OOTD: Springtime floral trousers

Outfit:
Black chiffon t-shirt: c/o F&F
Black and yellow floral trousers: c/o F&F
Beige midi trench coat: Zara (similar)
Yellow peeptoe heels: Karen Millen (similar)

What's that? Sun? Yes it is! Fingers crossed it's here to stay. You can never win with outfit pictures though - it was so bright when we took these!

I was asked by F&F to style up my take on Springwear fashion.  As soon as I spotted these floral trousers in the New In section, I knew they had to be mine. Then when I realised I had these yellow heels tucked away in my wardrobe I knew it was fate. I also got this chiffon black tee. It's got a cheeky little split at the back with loose short sleeves. I love the contrast of fitted trousers with a loose flowing top. The trousers fit like a dream and I've already got my eye on some more floral trousers on the website. F&F just seem to do spring/summer fashion so well. I'm waiting for some of the pieces I spotted at their press day to drop then I'm having a spending spree!

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