The pressure to do it all - it's ok to say no





Outfit:
Hot pink coat: ASOS (similar)
Black ruffle shirt: Zara (similar)
Distressed blue denim skinny jeans: George at ASDA (similar)
Gold pointed midi heels: ASOS (similar)

As much as times have changed over the years, there's still the age-old expectation of being a women and what it entails. It's something that I've been thinking a lot about since I've entered the last year of my twenties. Social pressures increase and people start implying and making comments about issues that I really have no interest in talking about with them. Everyone and their uncle Jack seems to have an opinion about everything you should be doing. The pressure almost becomes unbearable.

As a woman I do feel there is the pressure to absolutely boss it at work, give our all to both family and friend relationships, keep our homes ticking over as well as be independent and do the things that matter to us. We're expected to literally be superwoman and there's something wrong with us if we don't fulfil it. But there are only 24 hours in a day. And sometimes, this really just isn't possible. I feel like the pressure society puts us under makes me do a half-arsed job. I feel like I'm not actually giving anything my full attention and as a result I find myself running around like a headless chicken.  Then I feel like even more of a failure because nothing is being done to the best of a ability. It's so hard to hold your hands up and admit that you really can't do everything.

It's ok to re-evaluate, take a step back and say no. It doesn't make you lazy, it doesn't make you unappreciative and it doesn't make you a failure.  Think about what is important to you and not about what is important for society. If you don't want to do the washing up for a week and would prefer to go out to the pub with friends, then that's your decision. Who cares if your house is a little messy when you're living your best life enjoying the two for one bottles of prosecco on a Monday night?  It's ok to prioritise one thing above the other. It's also ok to ask for help if you need it. We all need a little helping hand at one point or another. It's what makes us human.


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Three places to visit in France that aren't Paris

I seem to be in the minority but Paris isn't really my jam. I'll continue to go as it's only a train journey away and I can't stay in the UK for too long. But I wasn't really that fussed about France until I started exploring other places. Now? I can't get enough! Here are three places to visit in France that aren't Paris. The capital city isn't everything!




Marseille
Marseille was the city that made me fall in love with France.  It could have been the beautiful blue skies but I absolutely adored it. In the centre, Le Panier is full of winding side streets with multi-coloured buildings just begging to get lost in. It's full of quirky independent shops and cute bars and cafes, perfect for losing a few hours of your day. Vieux Port is a great place to settle on a bench and watch the world go by before finding somewhere to fill your bellies. We had a wonderful lunch at La Poulpe, the set lunchtime menus in France really are fantastic. Make sure you head to the French African quarter of Noailles for somewhere a little different. Here you'll find delicious looking food and shops selling wonderful knick knacks you didn't realise you wanted.




Bordeaux
If you want a few days away from everyday life with incredible food and wine then book a flight to Bordeaux pronto. With architecture similar to Paris, it does have a fairly Parisian vibe but a lot cheaper. It's one of those places where you can spend as little or as much as you want and still have a great time. It's not a very big place so just wander where your feet take you. Half the fun is not knowing where you're going to end up. Wine enthusiasts should check out Citรฉ Du Vin which takes you through the science of wine - you even get a taster at the end.




Cรดte d'Azur coast
Oh my this coastline made me do the heart eye emoji from the moment I clapped eyes on it. I was only there for a weekend so just got to know Sanary-Sur-Mer and Hyerรฉs. Surrounded by palm trees and clear blue skies, I could hardly believe this was so close to home. Walking around it felt like I was in a type of DisneyLand. We stumbled across pastel coloured buildings, men selling the catch of the day on the edge of the sea and a bustling farmers market filled with deliciously plump vegetables, creamy cheeses and tempting biscuits. I'd love to hire a care and drive along the coast for week, stopping at the beautiful seaside towns along the way.
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How to do a gallery wall in your living room


Corner sofa: DFS*, Grey floor lamp: IKEA, Custard Cream cushion: Nikki McWilliams, Wire lampshade: IKEA, Mustard throw: H&M, Grey, navy and mustard cushion: Sainsbury's, Gin cushion:  Matalan

We first came up with the idea in Copenhagen two years to start collecting prints from every city we visit with the view to create a gallery wall when we moved out. We haven't managed to pick up a print in every city but we've got a great collection so far. I love having a mementos from trips we've been on as I'm a sucker for picking up a souvenir. They catch my eye and I'm immediately taken back to that walk along the river in Derry or the music festival we went to in Budapest. Here are my tips on how to create a gallery wall in your living room.

1. Choose a theme
We went for travel as it is something we're both so passionate about. If I'm honest, I never stop thinking about where to go on holiday! By choosing a theme I feel it helps to inject some of your personality into your house. Everyone always comments in the gallery wall when they visit and it's an immediate conversation starter. My friend Hannah has a music wall filled with posters from her favourite bands and gigs. It looks great and really does sum up her personality.

2. Pick different sizes
We've gone for a variety of sizes in prints in different colour frames. It helps to make it so much more interesting and much more of a statement. You want your gallery wall to make an impact as soon as you enter the room. Our frames come from both IKEA and Wilko. As we have white walls, we opted for a trio of colours to help make the prints stand out.


3. Lay them out on the floor
Before you take the plunge, make sure you lay them all out on the floor. Take pictures of different combinations so you can really study them before making up your mind. It's a big commitment to put a hole in the wall so make sure you 100% know what you want.

4. Leave room to add
If you choose a big space, arrange the prints so that it looks finished but also has room to add some more. I feel like a gallery wall is an ongoing project that can be added to as and when you fancy. We arranged our prints in the middle so we have enough room at the sides and below to add some more. We going to keep an eye out for some postcards on our next trips to try and fill some of the smaller spaces.

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How to spend 24 hours in Bordeaux



10am: Go for pastries at Le Boulangerie Saint Michel. Make you pick up a the local delicacy of Canelรจs. The sandcastle-shaped rum flavoured pastry has a tender centre with a caramelised outer. Once you've chosen a few pastries to try and a orange juice, head outside to find a bench overlooking the Saint Michel church. If go on a Monday, make sure you take time wander around the flea market to see if you can pick up any goodies to take home.


11am: Head to the tourist office to pick up a CityPass. Available for 24, 48 or 72 hours, the card offers free public transpire (even to the airport), free entry to most of the main attractions and discounts of some of the surrounding vineyards. Prices can be found on the website.


11.30am: Make sure you get to the Citรจ Du Vin before 12pm for free entry with the CityPass and a voucher to have a glass of wine. You'll be able to grab a tram from the city centre. Shaped like a decanter, the museum takes you through the science behind wine. You'll be given an audio guide and have lots of information to process. It's quite intense so be prepared to read a lot!


2pm: You'll have built up quite an appetite so it's time to grab a bite to eat. Karl offers a great selection of toasted sandwiches, quiches, salads and sweet treats. It's set in a pretty square so will be the perfect place to eat al-fresco if the weather is warm.


3.30pm: Now it's time to explore the city on foot. Sights to look for include Place de la Bourse, Grand Thรฉรขtre de Bordeaux, Bordeaux Cathedral, Post de Pierre bridge and Tour Pay Beland - which you'll be able to climb for cracking views of the city with your CityPass. We wanted to visit the Resistance museum but unfortunately it was closed.

5pm: Make time to stop at Le Comptoir Bordelais to buy some foodie souvenirs to take home. I treated myself to some fancy salt (it's such an old person thing to say but France has some great salt) and a box of canelรจs for my office. I also picked up some great caramels and chocolate to take home as gifts.

6pm: Stop by one of the many wine bars for a chance to try the region's wine. I highly recommend the Bordeaux Rosรฉ which I couldn't get enough off. We had a drink at Le Regent as we wanted to have a drink outside in the main square.


8pm: If you're watching your pennies, pump for L'Entrecรดte for dinner. The menu only consists of a simple walnut and lettuce salad to start followed for steak and frites. You can choose from medium-rare or just rare. The fries are unlimited so just catch the eye of the wait staff to ask for some more. But if you're looking to splash out then definitely book a table at Le Bouchon Bordelais. The cosy restaurant's menu changed weekly as they only use seasonly produce. You can order a la carte or as we did, opt for the taste menu. Priced at 55 euros, the nine courses are a surprise and they ask at the beginning of the meal if you have any allergies. Sadly I didn't get any decent pictures as it was too dark. But, I'd rate the food here as one of the best meals I've ever head, up there with my all-time favourite meal at Fleish in Copenhagen. It was simply divine.

10.30pm: If your belly can take it - ours couldn't and we headed home - try out a couple more of the wine bars. After all, you are in Bordeaux!
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Photo diary: a midweek break to Bordeaux


We were keen to get away for our anniversary this year as we did last year. We had no where particular in mind, everywhere is on our list, so just scoured Ryanair to find some cheap midweek flights that suited us. It was here we stumbled across Bordeaux for £20. Then when we found a AirBnB for £100 for both nights, it was a no brainer. Three days a way exploring somewhere new for £70 each? Yes please!






We had an afternoon flight and landed in Bordeaux just in time for dinner. Our travel writer at work has a friend who recommended we head to L'Entercรดte for the best steak and frites in the city. I would never pick steak in a restaurant as I don't enjoy eating it. But it's one of my boyfriend's favourite dishes so whenever we go away I always schedule in a restaurant. Because I'm nice like that. But this steak we had here? It was probably one of my favourite meals I have ever had. It was so simple yet utterly delicious. The medium rare steak was so soft that it literally melted in my mouth and the fries? Oh lord the fries. So crispy yet so fluffy in the inside. I've since heard they have a branch in London which I am visiting asap.






After gorging ourselves we retired to our apartment for an early-ish which I LOVE doing on holiday. I'm never about staying up late! The next day we had a pastry breakfast from Le Boulangrie Saint Michel, a bakery I'd found on Instagram, ate them on a bench overlooking a pretty church, and set off to explore the city in the day light. We ate some more, popped to the famous wine museum and tried to squeeze in a few more of the sights which were unfortunately closed. After going back for a nap, again a holiday tradition, we got ready for what we thought was going to be a five to seven taster menu at Le Bouchon Bordelais. It ended up being nine delicious courses of heaven. It was expensive but 100% worth it for a special occasion. Mainly seafood based, I'm still dreaming about the scallops with chorizo. You really can't visit Bordeaux without treating yourself to a meal there. My belly had never been so full!


Before we knew it it was time to jump on the bus back to the airport to fly home. But not before stuffing ourselves with a traditional French breakfast at Plume. If you fancy getting away from it all with lots of good food and great wine, it's a great palace for a few days. The architecture is very similar to Paris so it feels familiar. Make sure you check back in a few days for a more comprehensive list on how to spend 24 hours in Bordeaux. We really enjoyed wandering around and soaking up the city. I now want to explore even more of France with Brittany at the top of my list!
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2017: A year in books


One of my 2017 goals was to read more books and take advantage of my commute. I didn't hit my goal of 10 books this year but I did hit eight which I didn't think was too bad at all. A lot better than the three I read in 2016! I'm determined to read even more of my kindle this year. I'd love to hear any recommendations please. So what did I read?

Room - Emma Donoghue
Written from a little boy's perspective, this harrowing novel follows the story of a a woman who was kidnapped and kept as a prisoner. Half the book takes place in a garden prison so you really get a feel for the trauma the pair are going through. No stone is left uncovered as to how they're coping. It starts off slightly mundane to read but really picks up pace halfway through the book. It's such a heartbreaking read and brought a tear to my eye on more than one occasion. I saw the film before I read the book but I'd recommend not doing that. In order to get the most out of the book, you have to go in it with a completely clear mind.

A Tree Grows in Brooklyn - Betty Smith
Francie is a second-generation Irish American in New York City, growing up in poverty. The story follows her from an adolescent child in the summer of 1912 to an adult working in the big, bad world, with all her trials and tribulations along the way. Despite being written in 1943, the novel feels timeless. Sometimes I want to shake Francie and sometimes I want to give her a hug. The sign of a good book is when you get invested in the protagonist. It's a great read if you don't want to invest too much of your time - it's easy to pick up on a daily commute.

The Miniaturist - Jessie Burton
I fell for the hype for this and wanted to jump on the bandwagon. But now thinking about it, I'm not quite sure I enjoyed it. The novel tells the tale of a young naive woman married off in the 17th century Amsterdam to a man she doesn't know in a house full of secrets. I just feel like it never really got going for me. I did find the twists compelling and some of the secrets I never saw coming. But I can't quite put my finger on what I didn't like about it. I would be interested to see the TV show though as it'd be fascinating to see it portrayed on screen.

The Night Manager - John Le Carre
Slow at first, this book is addicting. John Le Carre has such a way with words that you find yourself holding your breath from one page to the next, being sucked into a web unsure of how everything is going to pan out. Jonathan Pine gets recruited as a spy to take down an arms seller,  and before he knows it has has dived head first into deceit and danger. I found myself willing Jonathan on and berating him for being careless. John Le Carre really never fails to deliver.

A Storm of Swords: Part 1 Steel and Snow -George R. R. Martin
I'm a massive Game of Thrones nut but by good do the books take me a long time to get through. I think I spent about five months reading this one. It's not the type in book you can pick up and get back into it straight away. As I don't read every day, I found myself having to go back a few pages each time to get my bearings. That said I just love the world that George R. R. Martin has created. I just need a break for a while before I start on the next one!

The Maze Runner - James Dashner
I found this dystopian future trilogy in a charity shop so thought they were worth the £3 investment as I'd seen the first film. As they're young adult fiction, they're pretty easy to read and aren't very big. The perfect commuter book! I really enjoyed it as its an interesting concept. A group of teenagers are at a place called 'The Glade' with no idea why or who they are.

The Thing Around Your Neck - Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
This collection of 12 short stories all focus on Nigerian women.  Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie is one of my favourite authors, I love how I can just lose myself in her writing and she chooses subjects that I don't know too much about, so they're always so interesting. I'm always left with so many questions and informations swirling around in my head. They encourage me to dig deeper and find out more. I'm not really sure short stories are for me as I find just as I get into them, they suddenly end and I'm left wanting more. Saying that they were really easy to read.

SSGB - Len Deighton
WWII is the period in history that I find the most interesting. I've been intrigued with toying with a couple of alternative history books for a while. I decided to take the plunge with this one. The United Kingdom lost the Battle of Britain and are not under Nazi occupations. There's a resistance in the north but the south is basically Nazi puppets. The story follows a British policeman who is trying to do the right thing. It's a fantastic book and one which I finished in a week. Not mean feat for this slow reader!
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Not being a Girl boss doesn't make you a failure





Outfit:
Beige oversize mac: ASOS (similar)
Skinny jeans: George at ASDA (similar)
Red gazelles: Adidas (similar)
Red checked scarf: Accessorize (similar)
Burgandy rucksack: Fjallraven kanken via ASOS

Girl boss is one of those buzz words at the minute. Women all over my social media timeline and in real life seem to be absolutely bossing at life. They're setting up businesses, choosing to work for themselves and climbing to the top of the career ladder. Without seeming to take a breath, they're at the top of their game and doing it with ease. I love seeing women do well, it gives me such a warm fuzzy feeling inside.

But I'm not a girl boss. Most days I feel like I can barely keep my head above water and I'm drowning thanks to poor time management skills. I don't really have any side hustles unless you count making an extra £30 a month on eBay selling my old clothes. After working 9-5 every week I just don't have the capacity in my brain to think about anything else. I can barely sometimes find enough energy to write on this blog even though once I settle down, it's one of my favourite things to do. I'm not an over-achiever, in fact it could be said that I'm probably a little bit of an underachiever because all I long for is a quiet life. Working to the point of exhaustion tends to be a badge of honour. I don't get enough gratification from working that I feel the need to own this badge.

But most of all, I don't want to to be a girl boss. Work really isn't the be all and end for me. I don't think I really want to climb to the very top of my career ladder. It may be lack of ambition but all I ever wanted was to have a job that I enjoy going into work every day in the career that I always dreamed off. That's always been enough for me. I've never been motivated by money and never wanted the insane responsibility that came with a large wage packet. I work hard, I try to do everything I can to the best of my ability so I know I gave it my all but I don't want work to define me.

It's ok to not want to do it all. It doesn't mean you're a failure.


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Batch cooking with John Lewis


Earlier in the week I popped along to the Waitrose cookery school in Kings Cross for a lesson in batch cooking with John Lewis. I've been to the cookery school twice now and I always have such a great evening. The chefs are so knowledgeable and patient. It's a brilliant way to find out more tricks in the kitchen. I vowed to become the batch cooking master when I moved into my new house but six week later, I still haven't gotten round to making it a regular thing. This will change though. I can't believe just how easy it is! It will hardly take any time at all to be prepared on a Sunday night.






We were taught how to make a basic tomato, basil and garlic sauce which can then be kept in the fridge for the week. It's best to un-season it, salt and pepper can be added when you make the different dishes, and to use plum tomatoes as these are the best quality. Try not to let the garlic burn as this will make it taste bitter. We were then given a demonstration on how the sauce could be used on a pizza and in a Shakshuka, a Middle Eastern dish of baked eggs. The dishes were prepared in what felt like no time at all and made me feel rather silly for not being too adventurous during the week. When it's THIS easy!




After stuffing our faces with the delicious pizza and one of the best Shaksukas I've had the pleasure of trying, it was time for us to make our own dinner with the sauce. I don't know how on earth I didn't realise it was this simple to make pasta or how I don't own a pasta machine yet. Next payday one will be mine. We made the classic Italian dish of pasta puttanesca. Homemade tagliatelle was tossed in a tasty concoction of salty anchovies, plump olives, flavoursome capers and the tomato sauce. Once the pasta was made, the dish came together in around 10 minutes. Amazing!

Thanks for such a lovely evening guys! It's always great to meet up with some old blogging friends and meet some new ones at the same time.
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The skincare products I always repurchase


Thanks to my job I get to raid beauty sales pretty often which is heaven for this product junkie. I'm often trialling lots of products because I can't stop myself for picking them up for a couple of quid. So I know when I actually buy something full price after it has run out that I'm on to a skincare winner. These are the products I have bought time and time again with my hard earned cash.

Philosophy Purity 3 in 1 cleanser
I swear by this and have been buying it for years. It's gentle on my skin, removes every inch of make up and a little goes a long way, meaning the bottle seems to last forever. Good news for my bank balance. Thanks to working in the city, my skin needs all the help it can to stop it from drying out. That commuter life! I use it every morning and it really does keep my skin feeling soft. That's all I want from a cleanser!

Garnier Skinactive Micellar Cleansing Water
I switched over to this a couple of years ago when I was having a bit of a poor month and couldn't afford my usual Bioderma Micellar water. I've never looked back. It great for my sensitive skin and I can use it whilst I have contact lenses in too. I only need to gentle sweep it across my face to remove make up - even stubborn mascara. My skin always feels so fresh and clean.


Origins Clear Improvement Charcoal Mask
This is my holy grail. I suffer from blackheads which I blame on commuting into London. But this beauty really helps to keep them at bay. I try to use it about twice a week and find a medium thick layer really works its magic. Let it dry completely for it to have maximum impact, I know how easy it is to get bored and wash it off when not quite all of it has hardened. I notice the effect almost immediately the next day.

No7 Early Defence Day Cream
I always think No 7 is an unsung hero. The range is always so gentle on my skin and I feel like it really works. I've been using this moisturiser for a good couple of years and despite trying other ones, I keep coming back to it.  When I don't use it for a few days I really notice tightness in my face. Which proves to me it does what it says on the tin!

Pixi Glow Tonic
Admittedly this is a very new addition to my skincare collection. I finally took the plunge after giving in to all the hype. I'm wishing I did it sooner! I'll definitely be buying this time and time again. Glycolic acid is said to be great for combating blackheads, which is something I mentioned above I suffer with, and with scarring.

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A Essex based lifestyle blogger who lives a champagne life on a lemonade purse!

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sophie.warner89@yahoo.co.uk.

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